By Tokiso “TKay” Nthebe
If you’ve ever flown, you know the pre-flight drill:
“In the unlikely event of low cabin pressure, oxygen masks will drop. Secure your own mask first before helping others.”
It’s not just aviation advice — it’s one of the most profound lessons about money management and financial planning you’ll ever hear.
Why Financial Boundaries Matter
For many millennials, Gen Z professionals, freelancers, and entrepreneurs, that simple rule is often forgotten when it comes to money. We give, we help, we rescue — even when it leaves us gasping for financial air.
During one of our recent corporate financial wellness workshops at TKO Financial Wellness, a young professional shared how she was drowning in debt. Her income barely covered her bills, yet she continued to support extended family.
Her story isn’t unique. Across Africa and beyond, countless young professionals shoulder the financial weight of caring for family — a cultural reality known as Black Tax.
This isn’t about turning your back on loved ones. Family and community support are beautiful values. But without clear financial boundaries, generosity can quickly become a financial strain, leading to resentment, burnout, and debt.
Healthy giving starts with healthy finances.
Understanding Black Tax and Its Emotional Impact
Black Tax is more than a financial responsibility — it’s deeply emotional. It represents love, gratitude, and duty to family. But it can also trigger guilt, anxiety, and pressure when you feel torn between supporting others and pursuing your own goals.
When you delay saving for emergencies, investing, or planning for retirement because of constant giving, it impacts not only your wallet but also your mental health.
In our TKO Money Adventures Podcast, we recently sat down with counselling psychologists Lebohang Bereng (Psychological Wellness Centre Lesotho) and Mpheng Ayat Thamae (MPT Psychological Support) to unpack this emotional weight. Together, we explored the psychology of giving, financial boundaries, and how to find balance.
Listen to the full conversations here:
3 Smart Money Moves for Healthier Giving
Here’s how you can honour family responsibilities without compromising your own financial health and freedom:
1️⃣ Budget for Generosity
Incorporate giving into your monthly budget. Decide how much you can afford to contribute without jeopardising your personal financial goals. Once that limit is reached, that’s your healthy boundary — no guilt, no debt.
2️⃣ Communicate Your Financial Goals
Be transparent with your loved ones. Explain your priorities — whether that’s saving for travel, building an emergency fund, buying a home, or investing for retirement. When people understand your vision, they’re more likely to respect your limits.
3️⃣ Prioritise Your Own Future
Taking care of your financial future isn’t selfish — it’s responsible. Think of it as putting on your oxygen mask first. When you’re financially stable, you can help others sustainably and without resentment.
Balancing Generosity With Long-Term Wealth
Caring for family and building wealth aren’t opposing forces — they can coexist with intention and planning. The key is balance.
You can:
✔️ Support your parents while still saving for retirement.
✔️Help siblings with school fees while investing in your business or side hustle.
✔️Contribute to your family home while building your own financial independence.
With sound financial planning, digital tools, and fintech innovations like automated savings and investment apps, it’s easier than ever to support loved ones without sacrificing your financial health.
Generosity is powerful, but it should never leave you financially and emotionally depleted.
When you establish clear money boundaries, you build wealth with purpose — one that uplifts you and those you love.
Your Money, Your Peace, Your Power
Healthy giving is intentional giving.
Protecting your financial health is an act of self-respect.
And long-term wealth starts with learning to say, “I want to help, but I also need to plan.”
At TKO Financial Wellness, we believe you can be generous and financially independent at the same time. Through financial literacy, coaching, and planning tools, we help you build financial confidence — so you can support others without losing yourself in the process.
Join the TKO Money Adventures community for more real stories, practical tools, and expert insights on:
- Financial planning and investment strategies
- Retirement and estate planning
- Money and mental health
- Tax and wealth-building
- Fintech tools for smarter money management
Let’s grow together — one intentional money move at a time.
Stay Trailblazing 💙
